Random thoughts about motherhood:
- Last Thursday I was very busy at work. Running from meetings to meetings. They were interesting, but all I was thinking about is how late I am into my pumping schedule. By the time I got into office, I shut the door and started pumping (40 min late!). In 20 min I only got 3oz (usually 4-5). Finished with it, packed everything and stepped to run into my baby. As I was driving, I felt stress for the first time. I was worried that work will get busier and I would not be able to keep the 3 pumping sessions, finish all the work I have to do, leave office at 5:30 and still maintain my sanity. Fortunately I calmed myself down pretty quickly, and when I saw her face at night, I was full of joy. All the worries vanished.
- I keep telling myself this: “I really want to breastfeed Sofia for a year, but if I can’t make it, it is okay!“
- When I became a mom, my perception about boobs changed. Seriously, it became the food producer instead of sexy part! I shut the door of my office when I pump but don’t lock it, and I never worry about someone entering. I wouldn’t be embarrassed, but he/she might.
- When I read bringing up babe, I liked the idea of keep the house mainly as it was before the baby, meaning no toys in the living room or any room except the nursery. Now I have toys everywhere
- Research is my life! I do research about poverty at work, and I do research of “how to travel with frozen milk” at home. Dry ice? cooler box? I soon will be traveling for work and will do whatever I can to keep pumping and ideally bring them back. I don’t want to waste “golden liquid”.
- Before having Sofia, I wanted to have at least a boy and a girl, so in a perfect world the second one has to be a boy. But with all the cute dresses we got for Sofia, I really want a second girl just to use them once again!
- When Sofia was a newborn, I read a lot about how to make her sleep/eat well. I was afraid that if I hold her into sleep, she will get spoiled and I would have to hold her forever! Well… the forever is too short! Next time, I will stop worrying about anything and just enjoy every minute of the newborn stage, or any stage because it passes WAY TOO FAST!!!
- I wonder as I love Sofia so much, how can I have another baby and love him/her the say way? Is it true that the first baby is always more special? What is to love more than one little person?